Five Things I Achieved When I Stopped Letting Fear Hold Me Back

Life can be hard; let's start being honest about that. We spend a lot of our existence being told how we should be living, trying to chase what is "expected" of us; and if the things we are doing don't fit that expectation then we feel shit. I find it quite ironic that all of the things we've been told that we "need" in order to be successful and happy, in actual fact can leave us feeling quite the opposite. Unfulfilled and unsatisfied.

The achievements I am most proud of are the ones that I decided were important to me. The ones I talked myself out of numerous times, due to fear. The ones that lingered in my mind and stayed there until I would address them. The thoughts I had that scared me, that I knew if I plucked up the courage to see them through, would make me really happy. The ones that I knew would help me to grow.

Passing my driving test

I started my driving lessons when I was about 20 years old. I took my practical once and failed. After this happened, I was so in my feelings about failing, that I let my theory run out and didn't get back into a car until I was 29! 

Every year I'd say, "This is the one! I need to just get it over and done with!" But me being me, scared of failing. I kept letting the time pass. Have you ever been so worried about perfection that you avoid doing certain things out of fear of failing? Then you don't end up getting anything done and it's just one big cycle? Well, I am also that person. Or I was. 

When I got to 29, I decided that I had to pass my test or at the very least be ready to take my test before I turnt 30. So I started revising for my theory... AGAIN! Then I started my lessons. The difference was, this time I kept it quiet so I could focus, meaning I felt less pressure and I had a deadline to work towards. 

Once I got back into the car, everything came back to me pretty quickly and my instructor and I decided that I was ready to take my test not too long afterwards. I failed the first practical I booked onto. I was so upset (because I'm just an emotional person lol) but I was more determined to pass ASAP than I felt sorry for myself. I literally went home that night and booked the closest date I could find; AND THIS TIME I PASSED! 

I ended up passing my driving test three months after my 30th birthday. But if I hadn't set myself that goal, I'd probably still be making excuses and probably still wouldn't have my driving licence.

No matter how long it takes or how scared you are; don't give up! 

I travelled abroad solo for the first time

I love to travel! I love it, I love it, I LOVE IT! Does anyone else get really agitated if they don't have a trip planned or one to look forward to? Me too! So, in December last year, when I saw 2018 was fast approaching and I had no trip in sight I decided that I needed to book something ASAP! I wanted to get away and it had to be in January.

Instead of coming back to work after the Christmas break depressed about being broke because of that stupid early December pay, and spending the next four weeks eating tinned soup in the cold; I was going to Tenerife. Alone. "I did it!", I told everyone as I hit the confirmation button with my heart racing. I'd never travelled abroad alone before. I had thought about it, but never knew if it was something I'd ever have the courage to do. I felt so proud of myself, but I was also nervous.

I chose Tenerife because it wasn't too far, was still hot in January and I hadn't been before. This was something else I could say I did when I turned 30. I mean, I was officially a grown up now!

I had the most amazing adventures on that trip and made sure I experienced something I'd never done before, everyday.

Do the things that scare you and don't wait to enjoy the things you love. Life is happening now!

I decided to leave toxic situations 

You guys may or may not be able to relate to this, but as I get older I really start analysing my life, thinking about my happiness and how I really feel about certain situations. I can't really explain it, but I guess I just want to be sure that I'm being honest with myself and living my truth.

Naturally in life, change happens. Friends come and go, circumstances change and certain things we thought will last forever, don't always work out that way.

Change can be scary and it's so easy for us to stay in situations that make us feel comfortable; but that doesn't always mean that they're right for us. Deep down I feel that we know when something feels right and if it doesn't, naturally we question that feeling. But then what? What happens after we've questioned that feeling? Do we choose to ignore it or to address it? 

The only way we grow is to face what makes us feel uncomfortable or even unhappy. So I really started addressing the things that didn't sit right with my soul. 

I began with trying to work on my own flaws, because sometimes we are the toxic person; to others and to ourselves. Everything isn't always someone else's fault and when we learn to admit that, growth is inevitable. I had a serious look at the people around me and decided that in order for me to be my best self, I would have to love certain people from afar. Just like any relationship, not everyone is supposed to stay with you on your journey. And I left my job. Now this was hands down one of the scariest things I've ever done in my life. I had no job lined up, I wasnt 100% certain what I'd do next, but I knew I was unhappy, extremely unfulfilled and something had to change. From the minute I decided it was what I wanted and needed to do; I didn't have one ounce of regret and it was the best decision I ever made.

Take control of your life because no one is going to do it for you.

I shaved my head

This is quite a short one because I've previously written about it here.

Since then, I've cut my hair even shorter and I'm even more in love! 

Shaving my head was something that I'd been scared to do for a long time and the fear came from a place that was based on the opinion of others. Others, whose opinions mean nothing because I'm still bald and beautiful! (Yes, I said it lol) Do those people who's opinions we take into consideration need to give us permission to live? Do we need their acceptance? No. So why should we even care what they think.

If we're living our best lives and people are judging us for doing so. Who really has the issue? 

Don't worry about what people think. You don't need their validation to be yourself! 

I started my blog

And here we are! 

I had a blog about seven years ago and to be honest I had no idea what I was doing. I enjoyed posting, but I genuinely believed no one was reading it and after a while I gave up. 

Fast forward seven years and I'm back again, but with a completely different mindset. Now I'm blogging because I have so much to say and I believe that I can empower people and spark interesting conversations through my stories. Even if only one person is touched by my words, that means the world to me.

Since I've started this blog the feedback has been great, but even better than that, people have reached out to me with stories of their own and have told me how reading certain posts has made them feel. That in itself is more than enough motivation for me to keep going.

I won't lie, it is a bit nerve-racking putting yourself out there and being so open, but I feel like there's no point in me blogging and sharing stories with you if I'm not being authentic and telling my truth. Sometimes that truth might not be pretty, but I can only be me, so I hope you stick along for the ride.

Stay true to yourself and don't give up on your dreams. 



  1. Keep up the good work inspirational looking forward to more of your posts

  2. I love your blog and this is probably my favourite post so far. Thank you for sharing ��


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