I've had short hair in the past and as a black woman I think it's pretty standard for us to change up our hair styles quite often.
For years I wanted to shave my hair off, but in between transitioning from relaxed to natural hair, the braids, the wigs, the natural fro; I always seemed to have a reason why it wasn't the right time. It was always in the back of my mind to shave it off, but I always wondered what people would say (I'll save this for another post).
The closer I got to turning 31, the more I couldn't shake the feeling. So, four days before my birthday I finally decided to do it.
This is what happened.
On my journey of self love, cutting my hair was about learning to accept myself fully; as I am. I love my natural hair, but there always seems to be judgement about what our natural hair should be like. Is your fro big enough? How loose are your curls? How long is your hair? And I feel there is a definite under-representation across the board, of women with hair like mine.
It always amazed me how people would react when I would even mention that I was thinking of cutting my hair. It was like I'd said the most absurd thing ever. "Why would you cut your hair?" ermmm.. why wouldn't I? "What? Bald?" Yessss!
My natural hair makes me feel powerful and has taught me to embrace my blackness in so many ways, however cutting it off has made me feel even more empowered. It helped me to realise that there were times where I wasn't wearing my braids or my massive fro out of self love, but out of validation. I believed that I would look more "attractive" in pictures or when I was going out, more "feminine", more "appealing".. but to who?! As Chidera Eggerue (aka @TheSlumflower) says in her book, What a Time to be Alone, "I do not owe anyone "pretty". Whichever state I choose to show up in will always be enough." And aint that the truth!
Part of growing involves being honest with yourself and checking yourself and your own toxic behaviour. I believe it's important to always ask yourself "why?" you are doing something when you choose to do it.
Your beauty and all of the reasons why you are an amazing person, have nothing to do with your exterior and everything to do about what is on the inside.
I cut my hair off and I have never felt more confident and beautiful.
I hope you know that you are beautiful too.
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